We have all heard the phrase "opposites attract" and today, we are going to discuss why that is.
Have you ever seen a couple and wonder why those two people chose each other?
Two different people that have very different backgrounds choosing to be in a committed relationship doesn't make a lot of sense at first glance.
Typically you would expect two people choosing to be in a relationship to share similar interests, have similar hobbies, and share a similar lifestyle.
However in most cases, we see the opposite - we see two people with very different lifestyles and different interests naturally attract to one another.
I have thought a lot about why this is and today I am going to share with you all my thoughts.
First things first, it is no secret that men are women are inherently quite different.
True masculine and true feminine traits are complete opposites to one another and our roles differ in many cases.
A man in his true masculine is a natural leader that is purpose driven and focused on pursuing something larger than himself, stoic and in control of his emotions, confident in his abilities, resourceful, and competent.
In other words, a man that is truly masculine understands his role is to protect and provide, and to be useful to everyone around him - a man that is born to serve God.
A woman in her true feminine is one that is soft, nurturing, a natural caregiver, and one that is supportive and capable of being able to raise a family.
A woman that is truly feminine understands her role is to be these things as a means of being able to serve a greater purpose by a way of serving God, and serving her man and her family.
We can see right off that bat that men and women naturally have opposite roles, and a man that is truly masculine is naturally going to be more attracted to a woman that he sees being capable of fitting his feminine counterpart.
In today's day-in-age, we see a lot of relationships fail because of men and women not being able to recognize their roles in a relationship.
One thing that is extremely evident is modern women acting and thinking like men, and modern men thinking and acting like women.
Women that think and act like men are never truly going to be a suitable counterpart for a man that is masculine.
Men that are masculine simply are not going to tolerate a woman that is going to contest them any chance that they get.
When two people think and act alike, they tend to always butt heads simply because one fails to submit to the other.
This is often why you will see masculine women settling for more passive men in a relationship.
The keyword here is settling because if a woman had the option to choose a man she desires, she would still rather be with a masculine man that is capable of protecting her, providing for her, and making decisions for her.
But the truth is, the more masculine a woman becomes, the less desirable she is by masculine men.
This does not go without mentioning that both men and women have a little bit of the opposite traits in them.
Simply put, men that are truly masculine do a have a soft feminine side to them and truly feminine women have a strong masculine side to them as well.
For example, you will always see a man's softer side come out when he is around children or when he is sitting on the couch with his woman, and you will always see a woman's stronger side come out when she is truly supportive of her man and his mission.
It takes a strong woman to invest into a man on a mission because she is naturally going to ride the highs and lows with him.
It is a matter of how much one displays that is going to determine if one is capable of being a truly masculine man or a true feminine woman.
A man cannot be masculine if he has a complete lack of emotional control.
If a man is neurotic and always in his feelings, his feelings will always cloud his judgement which will impair his ability to make sound decisions.
Whereas, a woman that is always defensive is going to severely lack feminine traits just for the simple fact that she feels that she is always on her own and has to be the one to make her own decisions.
We can see when we talk about masculinity and femininity objectively, we are opposites and for good reason because our opposite traits make us suitable counterparts to one another.
As we begin to peel back more layers as to why opposites attract, we can see that it always begins with the man's ability to be objectively masculine and the woman's ability to be objectively feminine.
Now, let's dive a little bit deeper...
Part of the reason why opposites attract in terms of a relationship is because people that are too much alike become extremely predictable.
If two people share the same interests or live a similar lifestyle, they will eventually have nothing to talk about or having any sort of opposing views.
Part of what is able to stimulate men in a relationship is his woman's ability to get him to think about things.
Given the natural fact that women see the world differently than men, a woman's point of view is something that stimulates men mentally just for the sheer fact she may see something that he does not see.
If a woman is capable of making a man think, that man is going to want to keep her around.
If a woman lacks the ability of being able to provide a different perspective and make her man think, the man will eventually grow bored.
This is part of the reason why men and women have friends - to surround themselves with people who are alike so they can bond over similar interests without any romantic ties to one another.
When it comes to a romantic partnership, I believe it is essential to be alike just enough in terms of core values, beliefs, and goals in life because these core fundamentals are what inspire people to commit to one another and grow together for a larger purpose, but not so much alike to where everything becomes predictable and boring.
They are called counterparts for a reason - where a man lacks, a woman gains and where a woman lacks, a man gains.
It is a matter of being able to identify each others strengths and weaknesses so that each can compliment one another.
I don't believe two people can compliment one another if both are exactly the same in every way.
From a woman's perspective, having a man that is different from her is what stimulates her mentally and emotionally.
Predictability is a huge factor for a woman's interest level in a man.
If a man is too predictable and lacks any sort of mystery, a woman will grow bored much sooner.
Women are stimulated by men that have stories to tell, are capable of teaching them things, and showing them new experiences in life.
If a woman feels like she cannot learn from her man, she will grow bored.
If a woman feels like her man is incapable of showing her things and giving her new experiences in life, she will grow bored.
This is why competence is such an important character trait for men to possess because it is competence that prove to women that a man is capable of becoming better, and the better he gets, the better she gets by extension.
This doesn't go without mentioning that when a woman is truly in love with a man, she will naturally start picking up some of his natural characteristics and interests.
Any man knows that a woman that is in love with him will start to dress like him, talk like him, and take up some of the interests and hobbies that he has introduced her to.
Two people choosing to be in a relationship with one another will eventually start to become one in the same and this is where commitment comes into the conversation.
Commitment is the hardest part for anyone when it comes to relationships in the modern world of dating.
The ease of accessibility via social media and such will always provide an outlet for new stimulation and that is why if you're going to date, you MUST do your due diligence.
Make sure the person you are courting is actually capable of making a commitment before you jump into anything.
Everything is always fine and dandy in the beginning when things are new until the initial stimulation wears off and the relationship begins.
But always remember if they are too much like you, it is probably to good to be true.