The other day, I asked my audience on Instagram for them to give me their top leading indicators for when a woman is truly interested in a man.
Overall, many of the answers were generally the same in that a woman that is truly interested in a man will show effort.
She will show effort in wanting to talk to him and wanting to see him, pays attention to the things he likes, etc.
Today, I want to share the leading indicators for when a man is truly interested in a woman.
I would like to share my thoughts on how to tell if a man is truly interested in a woman because I think there are a lot of women out there that just don't know if they are wasting their time or not when it comes to talking to a man.
The reason why I chose to talk about this subject today is because while there are similarities between how men and women show interest in the beginning stages, they also show interest in different ways as well.
It is without question that if a man is truly interested in you, he will check in on you - it might not be everyday at first, but he will reach out just to see how you are doing.
Typically when it comes to being a man, at first, if there is too much communication, things can go sour faster. Simply put, if you just meet and you go straight to talking all day everyday, this can potentially open the door for things to go south quicker.
Now, I know what you're thinking, "but if there is a connection, why wouldn't we talk all day?" And my answer to this is that a connection has to be built through consistency, not overload in the honeymoon phase.
You can tell that a man is interested in you if a few days go by without speaking and he reaches out to check in on you because it means that he is thinking about you.
This doesn't go without mentioning that a man who is interested will always enjoy hearing from you just to ask how his day went - again, it doesn't need to be an all-day endeavor of wanting to talk to this person.
Consistent communication at first in doses until it builds to a point where he knows for sure that he wants to be with you.
This is my biased opinion because I have been in the situation many times where the two of you are talking too much too soon because you like the person and you want to talk to them, until the honeymoon phase burns out and you're fucked.
Another way to tell if a man is interested in you is if he remembers little details about you that you only told him once - a man that is perceptive is a man that is listening and interested in what you have to say.
You told me your birthday once and I know your birthday is coming up, I made plans for us to go here for your birthday.
I once brought a girl a box of her favorite cookies and showed up to sing happy birthday to her because I knew her birthday was coming up.
It is small details that a man will express if he is truly interested in you or not.
If he doesn't pay attention to the things that you say or check in on you, you can guarantee that his mind is elsewhere.
A woman can also tell if a man is interested in her if he asks her deep questions.
If a man is asking you something personal about yourself it is because he wants to get to know the real you - he wants to see your authenticity.
Authenticity is something that men are extremely attracted to because it is authenticity that will tell a man if she is capable of building a genuine connection.
Real men want connection - little boys want trophies.
If a man is asking you something personal and sees that you have boundaries and offers you solutions to things you are insecure about, it it because he likes you.
A man that wants to get to know you will offer you solutions to problems you are facing because that is a man's job.
If you tell a man something personal and you never hear from him again, he was never interested.
With that being said, it isn't until a man asks for you to tell him about yourself that you should open up and start spilling your beans.
If you are sitting down with a man on the first date and start bringing up past traumas and ex-boyfriends, he is going to be looking for the front door.
Ladies, I can assure you that if a man is willing to sit there and listen to you spill the beans and just tell you everything you want to hear like, "oh, you don't deserve that", or my personal favorite "you're too beautiful to have to deal with that", then you can almost guarantee that he is there to get in your pants because he is physically attracted to you.
A man that is truly interested in you is going to help you solve problems.
If you spill the beans to a man who is actually listening to you, he is going to help you personally figure a way out.
I have always had a thing for what society might deem as "broken women".
I have always had a heart for a woman who never got the love she's always wanted and I have always been one to want to see the best in people.
I used to think in my past that I could "fix" a woman looking for real love by showing her that there are good men out there and this is how to be treated like a lady.
I realize now that this approach never works because you cannot change someone who doesn't want to change themselves.
Now, I approach it from an intellectual point of view - I offer solutions.
When I see a broken woman, the only thing I am thinking is how I can help her build confidence in herself - again, I do this by offering solutions.
If a woman can't apply the solutions that I give her, then there is no point in me trying to move forward with pursuing her.
But, I provide solutions to her problems because I care and I am interested in the woman.
The point that I am trying to make is that when a man truly likes you, he is going to help you workout whatever problem you have whether it is personal, whether it is your job, or whether it is one of you friends being a shit head because that is his job as a man.
If you express your feelings or things you are going through and he does nothing to offer you a solution, then he is not listening - he might hear what you're saying, but he is not listening.
Men are extremely simple and once you find out that a man truly likes you, then he is going to want to hear from you on a frequent basis.
When he has done the things I just described, he is going to want to hear from you more regularly because he has clearly shown that he is interested and he wants to hear from you and tell you about his day, while hearing about your day.
If at any point, his behavior or interest towards you is inconsistent (much like it is for women), he is not interested in you.
Simply put, if his interest in you is hot for a week or two, then it goes cold for a couple of weeks, then it is hot again, he is not interested.
I have noticed this pattern with many women in my life and 98% of the time it is because she is talking to other men.
Ladies, if a man likes you, he will make it known the same way you make it known when you are interested in us.
If he is entertaining other women, you don't have time for it.
I realize now that when a woman is entertaining other men, I simply remove myself entirely.
It is nothing personal, it is protection of my own peace because when a woman truly likes a man, she only wants to talk to him, not 2 or 3 or 10 other men.
The same rule applies to women when seeing if a man is truly interested in you or not.
If you know he is entertaining other women or he is just there to tell you everything that you want to hear so he has consistent sex with you, you do not have a man that is interested in the real you.