A few months ago, I wrote a blog about the reasoning as to me being single.
Being that it is a question that I am often asked, I figured I would write an entire post about it and put it in to words so that people could understand that me being single is a choice of mine.
While I will not get into the nitty gritty about my personal life in this post, you can always go back and give "Why Is Playboy Ranchin' Single?" a read.
Today, I want to talk about the truth about being single and choosing to be single.
Because while there are many people out there that are single and and don't want to be, there are some of us that are single and deliberately choose to be single.
The common denominator for those that are single and do not want to be and those that are single and do want to be is that being single is a choice, period.
Even if you don't want to be single, you are still choosing to be by default.
While you can sit there and try to give every argument as to why you're single, it doesn't solve your problem because you are still choosing the single life.
Even if you are trying to find someone and cannot find anyone that you like, you are still choosing to be single.
The reason why I say it is a choice because even if you are in the pursuit of finding a suitable partner for you and cannot find anyone you like, that is a clear sign that there are things about yourself that you do not like.
Maybe it is past traumas you are holding onto, or maybe it is another deep rooted problem you have not solved yet, but it isn't any of this "there are no more good men or women" garbage.
The truth is, there are plenty of good men and women out there and if you haven't found one yet, it is because you do not know where to look.
I believe they true key in finding the right partner is by default, it is simply completely random.
Maybe you met them shopping at HomeGoods, or saw them on a street somewhere.
Maybe you were just scrolling social media one day and found someone that particularly caught your eye and wasn't posting hundreds of photos in a bikini.
Either way, everything happens at completely random because that is just how life is - everything is about probability.
The probability of you meeting your future partner at your local HomeGoods is one in whatever your hometown population is.
The probability of you meeting your future partner in another country is one in 7 billion.
But the truth is, anything can happen at any given time, it all depends on your current state of mind.
If you have been following from the beginning, you know the message here at Playboy Ranchin' by now - we are a platform that brings men and women value tradition together, and encourages them to become their strongest and best selves.
The moral of this story is, if your state of mind is clear and you are doing the things that you have to do to be better than you were the day before, the right people will find you.
I believe this goes deeper than just romantic relationships, but friendships as well.
When your mind is focused on a place of leveling your life up, you will naturally attract and meet people in a similar boat as you.
When you are focused on winning, you will attract others that are focused on winning.
When you are focused on becoming the best possible version of yourself and you come to peace with yourself, the right person will be apparent to you.
The truth is, many people today just end up settling, both men and women.
Women will settle for men they do not respect and men will settle for women that do not respect them.
This is one of the biggest problems that people have when it comes to choosing a partner - a lack of respect.
The reality of it is, people that respect themselves, do not tolerate disrespect from others.
When someone tolerates bad behavior, it is because of a lack of self-respect and when someone lacks self-respect, they are less respected by others.
This is why people settle - because of a lack of self-respect and mutual respect.
You can ask anyone that is single today, I can guarantee you that no-one is going to say they are looking for the person to just settle with for the sake of security.
NO!
Men and women both want to settle with the person they genuinely desire and who desires them.
But why haven't you found that person?
Are you too busy swiping your thumbs off on dating apps?
Are you too busy DMing every girl you find attractive on Instagram hoping you at least get one reply?
If you answered yes to either of these questions, then you have your answer as to why your single - you simply have not done enough work on building yourself into a suitable partner for the person you're looking for.
I am a big believer in the initial spark of interest someone has for another person.
There is a beautiful woman that you see that for some reason stands above the rest and you feel like you have to get her attention.
See that I said A beautiful woman, not many beautiful women.
There are plenty of beautiful women out there, but this one for whatever reason stands above the rest and you take the most interest in her.
The same goes for women when finding the right man.
There will be something about that man that is different than the other men that you have taken interest in before.
The only way people find these kinds of people is by being in the right place at the right time.
How do you get to be in the right place at the right time?
By sticking to your values and staying true to who you are.
People don't just meet by accident, it is God bringing the two together to have an interaction and leaving it up to them to make the most out of it.
You get to being in the right place at the right time by being authentic to who you are and focusing on the things that make you strong.
If you want to find a partner that respects you, is confident, and is loyal to you, then you yourself need to have confidence, self-respect, and be capable of true genuine loyalty.
I don't men loyalty by today's standards, I mean loyalty by being ready to go to battle for someone else and protecting their peace at all costs.
I do think there is someone out there for everyone that they can build with and work for, but it starts with working on yourself to be able to attract the kind of person that will be willing to work for you.
Life is full of choices, it is a matter of clearing your mind and figuring out what is actually worth working for.