Over these next two days, I am going to talk more about red flags for both men and women, how to be able to identify them, and how to behave accordingly when faced with red flags.
Today, we will start with women and what I have found to be three of the biggest red flags that a man needs to be able to pick up on, especially when dating and/or entering into a new relationship with a woman.
Through my 17 years of dating experience, I have always had a very specific type of woman that I have always been attracted to - highly insecure and emotionally vulnerable women.
Over the years, I have experienced many of the same things over and over again with different women to the point that my brain has been trained to pick up on established behavior patterns that women have.
Human behavior works in patterns and humans in general are highly predictable if you are able to pay close enough attention to the things that people do.
It is very easy for someone to say one thing and do the complete opposite without even having a thought in their mind.
When a man meets a woman, there are things that he needs to be aware of and it starts with paying close attention to the things that she does.
If you are on a first date with a woman and she starts casually bringing up things that have happened to her in her past, especially with other men and ex-boyfriends, then this is a clear red flag of a promiscuous woman.
Unless there is an established foundation between the two of you and you ask her about her past, a woman that casually brings up her past experiences with other men is a clear sign of a promiscuous woman.
As we have stated in recent blogs that promiscuity in its most raw form is an addiction to attention.
This addiction that promiscuous women have comes from having some sort of emotional trauma, usually rooted in having a chaotic childhood.
When women come from an unloving background, they will often spend their lives living in a repetitive cycle of looking for the thing they have always wanted, but often find themselves chasing the the only thing they have ever known - toxic and unloving men.
As a man, you must accept that your biggest competition will always be a woman's childhood.
When a woman doesn't experience genuine love from a family unit or a father growing up, genuine love becomes completely foreign and unfamiliar to her.
The constant seek of approval promiscuous women have for male attention comes from not having the one thing they truly needed - a loving childhood.
When a woman has been loved properly by a family unit in her childhood, she is more accepting of love from a genuine man.
Promiscuous women will always have the writing on the wall from the very beginning - how they choose to dress in public, what they choose to post on social media, how she carries herself, how she treats others, who she chooses to be friends with etc. will all be things that men must pay close attention to.
Which brings me to red flag number two: a woman with many male friends.
We have talked about why women choosing good friends is extremely important to men in recent blogs but this is something that most women often get wrong when it comes to men.
A woman having a lot of male friends typically stems from the previous red flag that we just described in that women with a lot of male friends are usually highly promiscuous women - promiscuous in the sense that they are addicted to male attention.
Especially if she is an attractive woman, most of the time she will be naive to the fact that the only reason a man would truly decide to be "friends" with her is for his shot to eventually get into her pants.
Most men do not have pure intentions when it comes to having female friends because the reality of it is, most women don't have anything to offer men in terms of friendship that he cannot get from other men.
Men need friends that they are ready to go to battle with and I would argue that most female "friends" are not going to show up and take a bullet for you.
Are there exceptions to the rule? Yes, there are under certain conditions.
If there is absolutely ZERO sexual attraction between a man and a woman that are friends, then yes, it can work.
But as a man, this is something to pay close attention to because usually when a woman has a lot of male friends, it is because she is oftentimes hooked on seeking approval from men.
If she has a close male friend that she has been friends with from childhood and has his own life with his own family, or has a male friend where there is zero mutual sexual attraction but you know holds her accountable, then these can be exceptions.
Accountability is everything because if she is just surrounded by men telling her what she wants to hear, they are never going to have her best interests at heart and this is going to take some judgement of character on your part if you choose to have something serious with this particular woman.
A woman that is addicted to attention is a big no no for any man out there because it doesn't matter what you do, you will never be good enough for her.
So please gentlemen, pay close attention to the things that she does, not what she says.
The third and final red flag that men need to be aware of when it comes to dating a new woman will be in the beginning stages with her level of interest towards you.
When you first start talking to a new woman, her level of interest in you will tell you everything you need to know about her.
If you meet a woman and you decide to pursue her, you need to pay close attention to her level of communication with you from the very beginning.
If one day she is hot and she is all over you wanting to talk to you and the next day she is cold, this is a clear red flag that she has interest in someone else or she just isn't interested in you at all.
I have found when a woman's interest is hot and cold, it typically works in patterns.
She will be hot for one week or a couple of weeks, and then all of the sudden she stops showing interest - she stops texting you, her responses to you are shorter, or she begins to start blowing you off when you make plans with her.
I can guarantee you gentlemen that a woman that expresses this hot and cold level of interest is a promiscuous woman that is seeking attention from another man or multiple other men.
Very rarely will a woman go cold on you just because she isn't interested - usually, there is another man involved.
If she goes hot with you again after going cold, this is all the information that you need to respectfully walk away and move on to find someone else.
The truth is, I have dealt with enough promiscuous women in my life and they all have the exact same behavior patterns.
As a man, you must be able to identify what these behavior patterns are before you waste anymore of your time.
If a woman is truly addicted to seeking male attention, there is absolutely nothing you can do to change that and you must take action to protect your peace.
You could be the man of her dreams and check off every box on her list of requirements and still have nothing to offer her at the end of the day.
As a man, you must be able to identify these behavior patterns and act accordingly.
If a woman displays poor behavior in the beginning stages, just simply remove yourself from the situation entirely.
Don't be afraid of losing someone that doesn't and will never truly care about you.
If you decide to remove yourself and she asks for an explanation, then by all means, speak your peace, give her your truth, and move on.
If she never asks you why you decided to stop talking to her, then just accept that she was never interested in you and move on.
It is okay for a man to remove himself completely from something that doesn't serve his spirit or his purpose but you have to make peace with yourself about it first.
I have learned that it doesn't matter how much you may have liked her, if she never liked you then there is nothing you can do about it, except move on.
Take it from me, I have removed myself from plenty of women that weren't right for me in my life and I realize as I get older that if it isn't for me, then I will not waste anymore of my time or someone else's time.
This is something that comes with experience and I have been experiencing a lot of the same shit for the last 17 years of dating.
Gentlemen, you must get clear about your state of mind and what you are doing to attract the kinds of women that you attract.
If you are in a state of building yourself, then you will be able to distinguish a clear difference between a woman that is building herself and a woman who is not and has not.
If you build yourself into a strong and respectable man, you will naturally attract a strong and respectable woman.
This does not go without mentioning that on the come up, there will be women that find you attractive because they see what you're doing and they find it attractive but not every single woman is going to be a woman of pure intentions.
It is incredibly important for men to have pure intentions, stay focused on their mission, and be open and accepting to attract the right woman and build with her.
There is a difference between women looking for a husband and women that want to be wives - you MUST be able to distinguish this difference.