In a recent post, we talked about the importance of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable.
We talked about the various reasons as to the importance of having a willingness of doing things that are objectively difficult.
Once you have opened your mind to the benefits of trying and accomplishing new difficult tasks, the more you naturally build your own confidence in your capabilities.
Today, we are going to talk about one of the most difficult things that you can do.
This is more than bench pressing 400lbs or running a multi-million dollar company...
This is about you versus yourself and being able to have difficult conversations with yourself.
How many times have you looked back on the things you have done in your past and regretted them?
I think it is pretty safe to say that we have all experienced this feeling a time or two.
The important thing to extract from past reflections is being able to recognize our own behavior patterns.
In other words, being able to think about where we were mentally, how we treated ourselves, and how we treated others.
If this is your first time tuning into the Playboy Ranchin' channel, welcome!
We are glad to have you.
For those who have been reading along with our daily blogs, you know that I am no stranger to talking about the importance of recognizing our own behavior.
Behavior is the single most important thing that we need to be aware of as humans because behavior is patterned.
Oftentimes when we experience certain things, these things create feelings which then live in the subconscious part of our minds.
Even if we consciously believe we have gotten over whatever it is that triggers this feeling, the feelings will always return whenever we feel like we are in a similar place we have been in before.
Whenever something triggers a feeling or experience we have felt before, we often fall right back into the same repeated pattern over and over again and this is ultimately how people end up becoming victims of their own minds.
Have you ever met someone who is overly emotional and often blames others for the reasons why they don't have the desired outcomes they want in life?
Chances are, you have, and you are probably thinking of that person right now.
Maybe that person is even you.
Whenever you deliberately choose to blame some external thing or person as to why you do not have the things you want in life, you have officially fallen victim to your own mind.
What I am here to tell you is that it doesn't have to be that way forever.
When we are alone, this is when our own minds begin to speak to us and for this reason, some people never truly like being alone and feel like they always need to have someone else around.
I have learned over the course of my life that there is peace to be found in solidarity because when it is just you and your thoughts, you will often get to the bottom of things that live within you that you didn't even know were there.
While our own thoughts may be daunting at times, they are lessons to be learned.
This is why the hardest conversation you will ever have is with yourself.
You need to be able to understand what it is that makes you who you are and why.
You need to understand why you choose to behave the way that you do.
Only then will you be able to obtain true self-awareness and hold yourself accountable.
This is more then using past trauma as an excuse, even though past traumas will often effect our behavior patterns as we age.
This is far deeper than that.
It is hard to sit there and pick yourself apart, look at all of your flaws, and bring all of your insecurities to the surface because this often leaves us vulnerable.
Vulnerable in the sense that if we were to share these insecurities with others that they may never accept us.
There is some truth to this because the reality of it is, some people will never accept you for your flaws and the things that you have done that make you who you are.
However, the more you can live in truth, and the more you can be truthful to yourself, the more you will be able to accept your weaknesses and devise a plan as to how to make them into strengths.
It always starts with yourself, first.
If you ever plan on having rational, yet difficult conversations with say, a partner, then you will first need to master having these difficult conversations with yourself.
Especially as men, our job is to be able to recognize our vulnerabilities so that we can make them into our strengths.
There is absolutely no room in a man's life to sit there and pay the victim.
If you fuck up, you need to accept this and figure out a way to fix it.
None of us are perfect and we never will be.
In fact, I would argue that some of our insecurities we will carry with us to our graves, but that doesn't mean we can't still make the best out of them.
We were all given life for a reason and no-one is ever going to care about your life more than you, except for God.
God chose you to be one of his sons and daughters so that we may go out and serve to the best of our abilities.
If all you do is sit there and bask in your own misery, the only one you are ever going to truly be serving is yourself.
You need to be able to ask yourself behind closed doors why you are the way that you are.
You need to be able to understand that no-one else is as fault, except for you.
There will always be things that we cannot control, but as I have said a million times and is something you already inherently know - we can choose how we let things effect us.
While there might be someone close to you that is causing a problem and you might not be able to control them, it is still your problem to deal with.
Your insecurities are still your problems to deal with, and no-one is ever going to be able to solve them for you.
Sometimes, the only way to get over the hurdle is to just go straight through it, and it starts with you being able to have those difficult conversations with yourself.