How many times does the same thing need to keep happening to you for you to finally learn your lesson?
I have many theories on people and one of them I have had for a very long time: you can't tell people anything, you just need to let them figure it out for themselves.
Have you ever sat and given one of your friends a piece of advice, them agree with you, and they disregard it completely?
I notice it in a lot in relationships - someone is clearly not happy, they explain their situation, you give them your two cents as to how they could potentially fix it, and they still continue on doing the same thing they were doing before, until things eventually get worse.
The problem most people face, including myself, is the constant battle between logic and emotion. Simply meaning, you know the position you are in is bad, you know that you have to fix it, but would rather wait and see if things get better on their own because you have some type of personal feelings towards whatever the problem is.
I have come to a point in my life where I use more logic, than I do emotion. I learned through enough experiences in my past that acting purely out of emotion will do nothing to protect your peace if you are in a situation that doesn't fully suit your spirit.
It is good and bad being a man of reasoning because thinking too deeply about things can sometimes cut you off emotionally all together - as if you don't allow yourself to feel certain things.
I am aware of the fact that I find myself being too logical in certain situations and only I have the power to fix it.
I do believe having the ability to feel things is all a part of the human experience and one simply shouldn't just cut themselves off because they have found themselves feeling a little too much in situations they probably shouldn't have.
The battle between logic and emotion needs to have balance. One needs to be able to identify their situation and act accordingly, in order to protect their peace.
This is why as a man, it is essential to pick not only the best possible fit as the mother of your children, but a woman that truly protects your spirit.
Your peace of mind should be your number one priority. That means surrounding yourself with people, and an environment that brings you the most peace.
Sure, there are going to be extremely stressful days - most of a man's adult life is all stress as it is, but you know that you get to come home to a woman and a family that thinks the world of you because you are THE man.
I believe true peace of mind as a man is knowing that the people that love you and look up to you are safe and taken care of. Having a wife that supports you and is truly loyal to you because she knows there isn't a single man on the planet that works harder and is more capable than you. Having children that look up to you like you are a super hero because they know that they can always count on dad.
Being a man is hard, it is stressful, and there are always going to be problems that need to be solved. I would argue that the only way a man can truly find his peace of mind is getting comfortable with being uncomfortable - doing the things he has to do regardless of how he feels because he knows it will make him a stronger, more capable man.
Once a man achieves a certain level of confidence and capability, I believe the pieces of the puzzle will eventually fall into place in terms of him being able to have peace of mind. He will find a loyal woman that brings him genuine peace, and build a family with her that respects him because he has done the work.
One must first become aware of who they are and why they are the way that they are, if they are ever going to be able to live a life of peace.
You must be willing to go through shit, identify what that shit is trying to teach you, and use it to become better. You cannot have light without dark, sunshine without rain, or pleasure without pain.
Life is full of lessons and it is our duty to identify them and use them to our advantage, so that we can live out our best possible version of the human experience.