The topic for today's post honestly came to me at completely random, even though it is something I have thought about a lot.
We have all gone through hardships and in the modern culture, it is very normal to block someone entirely from being able to contact you, or from you contacting them when hardship happens.
It isn't like the old days where if things go south with someone, you just never see them or speak to them again.
Everyone is so easily accessible via cell phone or social media.
Blocking someone from being able to contact you is perfectly reasonable if you know that is not someone you want to be a part of your life.
Maybe someone is non-stop haggling you on social media or being creepy with their comments or messages - this is perfectly reasonable to block them because at the end of the day, they serve no purpose to you.
Or, maybe you had a hard breakup with someone or somebody hurt your feelings to the point where you no longer want anything to do with them, so you decide to block them because they are no longer someone you want to talk to.
These are all perfectly reasonable reasons as to why you would decide to block someone from contacting you.
However, I am going to play the devil's advocate here and present another perspective as to why I think people choose to block someone from contacting them, especially if it was someone they were once cordial with or even close to at one point.
The reason I say this is because I have been on both sides of blocking someone I used to care for, and I have also been blocked by others that I have cared for.
What I have found is that the only time I have ever chosen to block someone that I once cared about from my social media was to exert some level of power or control over the situation.
It came from a place of bitterness and while I may have tried to convince myself it was because I didn't want them looking at my stuff and trying to reach out to me, I realize that in hindsight it was because I was upset and insecure over the situation and it was the only thing that I thought would give me power in the situation.
While it is perfectly reasonable to not want to have someone you used to care for reach out to you anymore to re-trigger some past history, I have found that blocking them entirely doesn't give you the power you think that it does.
In fact, I would argue that what gives you the most power is not blocking them and allowing them to see you and watch you elevate to new heights in life.
Allow them to see you get in better shape, have a better looking partner, and continue to live a more fulfilling life without them - this gives you power.
If they try and reach out to you, ignore them!
While this is easier said then done, this is what gives people power is by utilizing their self-control.
If the person you don't want contacting you tries to reach out to you and realizes that they aren't blocked and you still ignored them, that is going to prove to them that they mean nothing to you anymore, even if they still do deep down inside.
To me, blocking someone from contacting you is the path of least resistance because you don't have to utilize any self-control.
Whenever I get blocked, I know it is because I am on that person's mind and for whatever reason, them blocking me is their way of being able to erase me completely and I don't think it ever truly does the trick.
I think if you want to prove to someone that you don't care, then you simply just ignore them.
Do not block them, do not unfollow them, just turn off being able to see them post and allow them too creep on you and continue to watch you win.
When they try and reach out to you, because they will, then you ignore them and continue on with your life.
This is exerting power and strength in the modern world.
If you want to have power over someone, just allow them to sit there and watch you win and do better without them.
Blocking someone does not give you power, if anything, it takes your power away from you because now you are expressing negative feelings towards someone else instead of just letting them be and moving on without them.
Blocking someone takes your power away from you, while allowing them to sit there and continue to watch you do better without them gives you power.
I have come to these conclusions based off of my own experiences.
I have realized that whenever I blocked someone I once cared about, which wasn't many, I still did not feel any better about not speaking to them anymore.
If anything, blocking them made me feel worse because I associated blocking them with a negative feeling.
I have realized that the best "revenge" anyone can honestly do is to win and continue to win so that the people that no longer want any part of you can't ignore you.
In these types of situations, I now choose self-control over the path of least resistance.
If some bum is being a creep on Instagram with their comments or whatever, then by all means block the shit out of them because as I stated previously, they serve absolutely no purpose to you.
But if it is someone you care about or once cared about, practicing self-control and continuing to live your life and show them that you are doing better without them, is the best way to maintain power in that situation.
I realize that by not blocking them, it leaves the door open for them to try and contact you and maybe that is the one thing that you don't want.
However, I would argue that you do want them to contact you just so that you can ignore them and continue on with your life as if nothing ever happened.
This to me is the absolute best way to show someone that you no longer care, even if you do.
The last thing I think anyone wants is associating blocking someone with a negative feeling because that takes all of your power away from you.
Again, I understand the logic because I have done this very same thing for the very same reason before, but I am also saying that it personally did not make me feel any better.
Every time I have removed myself from someone I cared about, I got greater satisfaction by not responding to them whenever they reached out, regardless if it was hard or not.
It is the self-control in these kinds of situations that will give you more power, not taking the path of least resistance and leaving your power with them.